Klaus (
jasidian) wrote in
badgernet_multiversal2021-08-16 01:16 pm
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Entry tags:
Video | Intro
[ There's a matcha green, underbite-y toddler staring at the other end of the device. She's wearing a loose-fitting cotton dress, her dark brown hair messily pulled back, and holds in her hand a half-eaten, baby-sized banana.
She puts the banana down on the goddamned floor and taps the device a bit before trying to put it in her mouth. It is too wide to go in her mouth.
As she babbles something that's comprehensible only to an exasperated parent, you get a glimpse of the area around her. Clearly the private study of some sort of eccentric millionaire obsessed with weird magic forbidden knowledge shit. There's like, specimens in jars and anatomical diagrams framed on the walls and everything. Plus walls and walls full of old-ass bookshelves. Not the kind of place that you'd expect a toddler to be in, but then-
Then she gets scooped up by a massive, bearded orc man who sighs, boops her nose, and places the device on a table before wiping the saliva off the screen with a handkerchief.]
Oof, I didn't anticipate this ending up here, but... um, hello! Sorry if I ought to have said something earlier, I've been away from home for a while and then I was so caught up with some research, and I suppose I didn't-
Harliss, Harley sweetie, no, I promise you that you do not want to eat this-
-erm, I just didn't expect there to be a... Whatever this is. In my study.
... this isn't another demon thing, is it.
[ There's a weak little laugh. ]
She puts the banana down on the goddamned floor and taps the device a bit before trying to put it in her mouth. It is too wide to go in her mouth.
As she babbles something that's comprehensible only to an exasperated parent, you get a glimpse of the area around her. Clearly the private study of some sort of eccentric millionaire obsessed with weird magic forbidden knowledge shit. There's like, specimens in jars and anatomical diagrams framed on the walls and everything. Plus walls and walls full of old-ass bookshelves. Not the kind of place that you'd expect a toddler to be in, but then-
Then she gets scooped up by a massive, bearded orc man who sighs, boops her nose, and places the device on a table before wiping the saliva off the screen with a handkerchief.]
Oof, I didn't anticipate this ending up here, but... um, hello! Sorry if I ought to have said something earlier, I've been away from home for a while and then I was so caught up with some research, and I suppose I didn't-
Harliss, Harley sweetie, no, I promise you that you do not want to eat this-
-erm, I just didn't expect there to be a... Whatever this is. In my study.
... this isn't another demon thing, is it.
[ There's a weak little laugh. ]
Video
Oh for...
[She blinks as the big, green guy comes on screen and picks up the little one. Trixie can't help but smile a bit, as some things seem universal with kids putting things they shouldn't in their mouths.]
I doubt it's demonic... Magical and highly annoying on the other hoof...
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[ There's a dorky little grin and a small chuckle. Meanwhile, the tiny orc in his arms is reaching out for the communicator and making distressed, teakettle-like noises. Let her have her screen time, Dad. ]
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[She pauses and hesitates a moment before cautiously asking]
So, uh, I don't want to be rude but what species are you?
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[ He seems genuinely confused about someone who doesn't know what an orc is? Like he's pretty sure that's a talking unicorn, which is not the weirdest thing he's ever seen. ]
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[She shook her head.]
This thing is weird. I've talked to a human on it too, more than one. It's really strange, but learning things and making friends is nice.
[At least it was when she got her personal space when it came to the latter.]
Video
Also there's me, and there was one other guy but I think he's gone now.
Pidonus Marasia, Succubus but more importantly Bard, hiding in a cave at your service.
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Klaus Vanderboren, priest, scholar, all-around...nerd?
[ He still gets called a nerd, even after all these years. ]
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Mostly curious. For clarity, bardic stuff does allow me to do a bunch of magic and adjacent stuff, so, yay.
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I suppose there's most likely worlds on which it doesn't, but...in my experience, it usually does.
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But yeah, it should be safe. At least, it's probably enough that I could use info from it for plane shifting.
If I knew Plane Shift.
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He eventually comes to the conclusion that, at the very worst, Pidonus might just have to do a sleepover at his place for a day. ]
...if you need any help with something, well.
I can see what I can do for you.
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There's a few situations that I'm kinda concerned about on other worlds, not counting my own which is why I can't just find a local ally of the appropriate power level.
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He is immediately cut off by the tiny orc squealing in response.
"HI!"
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Although I scarcely think there's a lot of people who'd be able to keep it up for as long as people might suspect, if that's what they're assuming here.
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[ There's a small laugh. Meanwhile the kid looks lost in thought in his arms, one hand in her mouth. ]
But I suppose if you're not used to planar stuff, that's...the only plausible explanation there is. Even if it's still less likely than actual magic.
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Pardon me asking, but what exactly is an "internet"?
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[This is immediately followed by a text reply:]
vidja
cameramagic mirror, gazing into it to try and get a... good view? ]An orc! Are you a part of Paul's army? What's the situation like over there?
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I feel like this is going to be awkward, but... Who's Paul?
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[ ... if he doesn't know who Paul is... but no, he's an orc. She hasn't seen any other orcs on here, only humans and human lookalikes and one unicorn.
He has to be from her world, right? ]
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I know this isn't exactly what you'd wanted to hear, but...I'm sorry, I have no idea who that is.
video
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[For multiple reasons. Angels don't tend to leave Heaven as a rule, and Neriel would remember a species like this turning up in the Creation files.
Probably, anyway. Earth got the most attention, which doesn't mean everything else in the universe is uninhabited, but even so.]
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vidya
...warlock? Is my first guess?
Your kid's cute. Nice to meet you?
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It's...great to meet you too?
[ The kid, meanwhile, is giving a little wave after some prompting from her dad (probably along the lines of "say hi, Harley".) ]
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[ That tiny orc in his arms is now trying to reach for the new person. Hi! ]