aren't you glad this was the first video post

[britbrat]

[ Badgernet's video function is broken in today by a disconcertingly close-up pair of blue eyes and a muffled: ]

- oh, blast -

[ Some fiddling and repositioning later, the eyes are revealed to belong to a boy no older than eleven, wearing an unusually green suit and an expression of astonishment. ]

I say, this really is a marvelous little device, isn't it? Right, then:

[ He straightens up to his full height of... not very tall, rearranging his face into a practiced superciliousness. ]

It's all well and good to go around claiming to be angels and devils and what have you, but clearly this gadget's more than just an elaborate typewriter, isn't it? I suggest you all show yourselves! Look, I've done so first, as a gesture of goodwill.

[ And definitely not because he hit the video button by accident while snooping! Luckily(?), internet stranger danger isn't a concept in his time yet, so he continues: ]

And shall we take a roll call while we're at it? You may call me Valmont, and at present I am located in San Francisco, in the year 1976 A.D. Are all of you people really from the future - ?

Who are you talking to, sweetie?

Oh, double blast -

[ A hasty rearranging of the camera view, and a brief close-up of the inside of an expensive suit pocket, before the feed turns off. ]

Comments

[britbrat]

Of course I was eager about it, when I didn't think it was actually going to happen!

[ Can you argue with that logic? ]

Right. Shame we couldn't do business and all that, but, er. If you ever come up with any method of gaining power that doesn't involve any part of me getting horribly devoured, I shall be happy to listen.

[superstylishsquid]

[He shrugs and re-folds his wings...which seem to take up much less space than their full size a moment ago would suggest. There's some more clattering in the background, as if someone was working on cleaning up a mess.]

Nothing off the top of my head, unless you happen to have access to alchemical reagents.

[britbrat]

[ Oh, thank god, the devil's not going to push the subject. Valmont lets out a sigh of relief and immediately tries to pretend he didn't. Was someone scared for his life in this conversation? Ha ha not him!! ]

As I have no idea what those are, I shall go ahead and assume that I don't, shall I?

[superstylishsquid]

Good assumption. In that case, I guess you're just stuck with hard work. Shortcuts tend to be risky.

[britbrat]

Hard work?!

[ You'd be forgiven for assuming Alastor had suggested he eat a live puppy, given how outraged Valmont sounds at that comment. ]

Absolutely not. There's bound to be some way out there to achieve wealth and power without exerting (eurgh) effort. I just have to find it, that's all.

[superstylishsquid]

None that don't have some kind of trade off or risk, at least not for mortals. You guys get to make whatever you want of you world, but there's no such thing as a free lunch.

[britbrat]

There should be.

[ Pout. ]

[superstylishsquid]

Nah, trust me on this...shortcuts like that? Eventually, someone's gonna get it in their head that they don't want anyone replicating their success. Happened in the underworld, and I can't exactly say it ended well for anyone.

[britbrat]

And I suppose you'll try to scare me straight with that story as well, will you?

[superstylishsquid]

Nope, just a reason to not grumble too much. If a shortcut like that existed for humans, you'd probably already be living under the iron fisted rule of the most recent person to find it.

[britbrat]

All the more reason, I should think, to become that person myself.

[ Iron fisted rule? Doesn't sound too bad, depending on which side of it you're looking from. ]